Seven ER shifts left and all I can think of is the resistance I've gotten from damn near everyone about how much of a travesty I feel doing this rotation is.
From within my own program to the Chief peds resident to my own Chief resident, everyone seems to think this is less of an issue than I do. Which just pisses me off even more.
Part of me wants to forge ahead on my own agenda, but it seems that with no backing from those "in power" I'd just be futile-ly spinning my wheels. And when that happens, I simply check out, meaning I stop giving a shit about those that don't give a shit about me.And that's what is dangerously close on the horizon for me. When I think about it, no one here has tried to make a good impression; in fact, the effort has been nonexistent, which makes me think that they song and dance they put on during interviews was just that: a song and dance.
Methinks again, that things will change when I get on the "other side" but I'm not inclined to recruit or represent an organization that I don't believe in.And it's terribly funny and disheartening to hear people talk about residency: "just hang in there, it'll get better." And when it doesn't, they say: "well, look how far you've come." Sounds like a catch-22 if I've ever heard one.
Misery loves company and there's no better place to breed it than residency.Go healthcare!
“I’m the one asking you the questions, Lorna.”
2 years ago
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