Professional: BOHICA again...

So once again, I get screwed. Now I must move my continuity clinic to appease a fellow resident who failed miserably at taking care of his business. Now I suffer the consequences. It's really disheartening for me, mainly because I had pretty successfully moved to the background and kept to myself.

I stopped going to candidate dinners and raising a fuss with the unethical research requirement. I stopped sending any types of emails or giving my input at all. I was meticulous in regards to covering my bases and making sure that all the i's were dotted and the t's crossed.

And now this.

What really gets me is that my fellow resident didn't admit fault and instead acts as if I did something wrong when I didn't.

I could argue and try to make my case, but why? I know these people already are biased against me and any rebuttal would just make things worse. It's really funny when I talk to other friends because they've always been cautious of me being here, believing that there are much better, more appropriate places for me.

And now I would agree. In fact, I'm taking it a step further...or is it farther? Anywhoo, I would venture to say that alot of this is either personal (i.e. vindication for calling their shit all the time) or racial. At this point, the two are likely ground well into one another.

So what do I do now?

For starters, I've started seeing my therapist again, so that's good. I don't know that she can offer much help, but she is helping me think through some things. I always just unload on her; I hope she's not experiencing too much transference, cuz I know I'm giving it off. :)

Secondly, I'm seeing my massage therapist who helps keep my neck from becoming torticollis.

Thirdly, I'm doing lots of positive self talk, in hopes that I will convince myself to stick around for the next 2 years...

I'm not sure what's gonna happen, but it'll be interesting to say the least...